Well this month was definitely an interesting one, especially since we had 4 days off work due to Alabama snow. One of those days it was 40 degrees and sunny! Which is definitely the best kind of snow days.

We started working on our little house again after what seems like 6 months off. We’re currently working in the office, which is the last full size room to be completed. It’s also the room that will require the most work. There isn’t a Zac Efron poster decoupaged on the wall, but there are more holes than possible to count that need to be filled in. We began scraped off loose paint and ripping up the carpet and tack board along the edge of the room. And by we, I mean myself and the renter, because James learned a valuable lesson this month (which ironically he learned February of last year, but seems to need a yearly reminder)…

Don’t test the limits of food. If the egg looks sketchy, don’t eat it. Food poisoning is bad. Always, bad.

For anyone that knows my husband, they know he has a lot of plans. He makes all these plans with the best intentions, but there are a lot of things that J wants to do; fix a 4-wheeler, ride across the country on his motorcycle, brew beer, shoot pistol in the Olympics, remodel a house, flip cars on Craigslist, farm… Each of these goals separately are completely obtainable. The problem is that J wants to do them all right now.

Our new home we bought is situated on 20 acres. J was excited about this because he wants to “farm”, aka grow a garden. So far farming has involved buying a tractor, buying pieces for the tractor, working on the tractor and driving it around the yard. After that the other projects overtook the farming idea.

But last night we started watching this show on Netflix about a family in Alaska that homesteads. They completely live off the land, even when there is 10 months of winter. I think this show sparked J’s memory, that he had previously bought a lot of seeds to plant. Now we’ll be going to California in 3 days for 2 weeks, so starting a garden right now is a bit of a problem for us. So we started our homesteading 1 egg carton at a time.

Looking through the seeds and finding some dirt!

Appetizer sticks double as plant markers

We locked up the pods in a room in front of a window so the cats wouldn’t decide to play in the dirt. Now to see if anything starts growing when we return home mid-March!

Dog Poop Soup

 Did other people say this to their children??

Or was my family the only one to threaten us with eating dog poop soup for supper?

Sammy the Snake.

Sammy the Snake was a Sly creature. He Slithered around Slurring his Sentences. “Ssssay now…”

In a sneaky way to tickle us or make us laugh my moms hand puppet was called Sammy the Snake. This wasn’t something that I forgot about but the other day I was reminded of Sammy and was thinking how this was something that was mostly between my mom and Joey. Sometimes mom would use Sammy to tickle me, but mostly Sammy and Joey laughed about things.

I am older than Joey, so I went to school while he stayed at home for two years. Neither of us ever went to much of a day care or pre-school because my mom worked part time and my dad farmed and they were able to watch us. (I still think in this aspect we are some of the most spoiled children ever).

But I just was thinking that during the time that Joey was at home he was building two years of memories that I don’t have. It’s extremely selfish to not notice things like this before, but I think it’s an overall human flaw to not realize that other people directly around you are still essentially on their own. I don’t remember a time before Joey, and he never had one with out me, but I still have memories that exclude him at home. He must have many more from his childhood. Sammy the Snake, is one of them. I just never thought to think of it that way.

I was sitting at my kitchen bar, and for no reason what so ever, my memory was jogged. I had the feeling of remembering a very crucial part of my childhood; things that feel like a former life and also like I could reach out and touch them. And I thought, how could I have ever forgotten that in the first place?

When Joey and I were little we kept a large, flat board stored between the couch and the wall. It slid behind the back, concealed from view. We used it to color on when we were in the living room, which was carpeted. I think it originally came around as a mat for play-doh so we wouldn’t get crumbs in the carpet. But once it was there we used it for lots of things. It was such an important part of our play when we built forts or set up hot wheels. It was the starting point of many imaginative days.

One side of the board had small ridges on it that made it uneven to color on, but when you’re laying on the carpet the smoothness of your strokes don’t really matter. It also had a small chip out of one side so it wasn’t an even rectangle. There were marker lines drawn across it and play-doh stuck in the cracks.

The last time I was home I had to check to see if the board was still stored behind the blue couch. Mom said she’d just recently moved it. I’m not sad it’s gone, it wasn’t an actual toy, but I really did get such a tranquil peace of mind remembering it. I simply felt transported back in time thinking “Remember how we used to color on that board…”

I’ve been trying to say this for awhile, but just didn’t know how…

I can’t be alone.

Once, my completely crippling fear of doing something on my own kept me from going to my friends wedding.

A girl who I had lived with in college for 3 years was getting married the same weekend that J had shoulder surgery. Determined that I wouldn’t miss this sacred event in her life, I booked a hotel room for myself and left early Saturday morning to make the 6 hour drive.

Another one of the roommates we lived with had text me earlier about meeting up. I was relieved to have someone to sit with at the wedding since I wasn’t that close to her family. I text this same girl as I was leaving home, letting her know I’d be there in driving time.

Me-“Hey! I’ve just left my house so I’ll be there right before the wedding. Want to meet up somewhere before?”

Going-To-Be-Sitting-With-Friend-“I’m in the wedding so I’m already here getting ready. We’re all so excited to see you though!!!”

I’m sure she used this many exclamation points because-

1. I was the only roommate thus far to move away and they probably were excited for us all to be reunited.

2. She must have felt bad that I didn’t know she was in the wedding. And yea, I felt terrible.

I called James in a panic. I don’t want to sit by myself at the wedding, or especially the reception where they’re all going to be sitting up front and I’ll have no one! I don’t want to have to walk in alone, sit along, eat alone, never ever ever be alone!

This problem isn’t a new development. My parents often tell me that I have a brother because they wanted to make sure I had someone to play with. If I hadn’t had a sibling I would have annoyed the shit out of them trying to get attention. I’ve just never liked being alone. I don’t mind it every once in awhile (obviously I write and do a little crafting alone) but even that is better if my cats are near me and I know J is just down stairs.

I had to pull over on the side of the road, at one of those gas stations that just have pumps around the outside of the building, and completely bawl my eyes out. I really wanted to get out of town and go to the wedding, but more than that I didn’t want to go alone. I tried begging J to come with me. I tried imagining that I could show up to this wedding alone. But in reality, I made it 30 minutes away from home by myself and had such a mental breakdown I had to come back.

Maybe it’s a little ridiculous and I should have sucked it up and gone alone. But I’m such an introvert when it comes to meeting people I knew I’d sit at the wedding alone and talk to no one. It’s why I have a hard time making friends, even though I want them. And in a vicious cycle- I don’t want to go anywhere alone, but I don’t know how to make friends to go with.

Depression is lonely and loneliness is depressing.

The weirdest thing happened here yesterday, we got a snow day! At 11:00 we got to go home from work, and around 1:00 they called to tell us work would be cancelled for today too!

Although we only ended up with about 4 inches of snow, for the South that’s A LOT. It was like the end of the world for awhile; calls not going through, babies being born on the road, hundreds of cars stuck in the ditches. The weather updates say, “Extreme Travel Chaos in the Deep South.” Luckily we were at home playing in the snow by the time that all happened. And today we’ll be staying warm inside!

I thought I’d post a January update about the GaterBait household.

The south is going through a weird cold spell, along with most of the nation, so we’ve been hiding inside by the space heater most days. We did start painting our breakfast nook and move in an entertainment center last week, but our other projects have been on hold. Instead of getting much done on the house(s), I’ve been crafting. I’ve definitely enjoyed spending some time feeling artsy.

J finally broke down and went to the doctor about his shoulder hurting. They told him because he’d had shoulder surgery about 15 months ago there is a misalignment in that arm causing some inflammation. He got some anti-inflammatory cream and has been trying it for the last week. However, he still feels like he has so much pain in his shoulder that he needs another option. He’d like to avoid another surgery, so is thinking some physical therapy and even a chiropractor might help.

We got to experience puppy sitting a few times this month with our friends pit bull. She is the sweetest dog and I think next time the puppy sitting might turn into puppy stealing. After we had to give her back J woke up in the morning and still went outside looking for her out of habit. We wouldn’t be very good dog owners though, since we travel so much. The cats are more resilient to being left alone for a few days.

Was there a storm 12 weeks ago that I missed? Several of our friends have announced that they’re 12 weeks pregnant. In celebration, J and I had a beer for them, and then discussed having an impromptu trip to New Orleans with friends. You’re only 25 once!

My grandfather celebrated his 90th birthday last week, and had a party over the weekend. I was so depressed on Saturday that I couldn’t be home for it. The hardest part about living far from my family is missing things like that. In fact the anticipation of knowing I couldn’t be there, and the after math of knowing I missed it, kinda ruined my week.

We hope everyone else had a great January, and thinks warm thoughts for February!