Today I noticed that I was standing on a huge cliff. I wasn’t just standing on a mountain looking out over the distance, but I was standing really, really close to the edge of a huge drop off. And I realized, this is how life happens.

You spend what feels like forever climbing up to the top of this cliff, and all you’re thinking about is that this is all you’ve ever wanted. You can’t remember wanting anything more than getting to the top. You’re so driven to just get there you can’t think about anything else. But then you get to the top and you hardly even remember all that climbing. It didn’t really seem to take that long, or be that much work. You didn’t even realize you were getting close to the end until you were about to step off the edge and fall. So you look behind you and there are tons of peaks you’ve climbed.

All I wanted was to graduate and get out of town, so I climbed as fast as I could until there wasn’t even a cap and gown at the end. Then all I wanted was to get married, so I dug in and trekked it out until suddenly I was in Alabama. I wanted a new house, so we held hands and climbed as fast as two people can climb together. And suddenly we’re standing on top of this cliff together and I realize I whined the whole time how it was taking forever and my legs hurt and it wasn’t ever going to end… but now I know I’m about to fall off this cliff whether I like it or not. And once I fall, just like all those other ledges, there won’t be any climbing back up behind you.

It’s exactly like standing on a cliff. Like all your previous motion is going to push you forward and off the edge even though you’re not even trying anymore. I can feel the weightless feeling in my stomach and I’m about to plunge to the bottom.

It’s exactly like a cliff, and this is exactly how life happens to me.